HOW TO GET ANY WRITING DONE AT YOUR NEIGHBORHOOD COFFEE SHOP

If you're a freelance writer, you get most of your work done from home. Everyday you sit down on your bed, at a table or desk, and eve...

If you're a freelance writer, you get most of your work done from home. Everyday you sit down on your bed, at a table or desk, and everyday the scenery becomes less and less inspiring. The convenience of working from home begins to wear off. It's natural to want to mix up your work environment. While I do enjoy the comforts of working from home, I like to visit my neighborhood coffee shop to get some work done.

hot chocolate, the coffee shop

I try to avoid going to Starbucks because I want to help the local mom and pop coffee shops survive for a few more years before Starbucks crushes their dreams. Writing at a coffee shop does come with its inconveniences and limitations.

First of all, working anywhere but home means you have to physically drive or walk to a place that sells coffee and hope they won't say anything when you abuse their wi-fi. That time and effort seems almost not worth it, but then you remember that life is short so why not kill some time in a car, thereby, dramatically increasing your chances of dying. 

Once you arrive at the coffee shop, you'll order your food and drinks, sit down, open your laptop and start typing away. There will, inevitably, be that nosy person that's curious enough to peek at your screen. That's why I always type in big, bold letters, "Killing Spree Manifesto" across the top of whatever document I'm working on. It works like a charm,

Not only will you have to deal with these intrusive assholes, but worse, you''ll run into someone you know. Avoid small talk or any type of interaction during your valuable work time by denying your identity, even when the cashier says your name out loud while handing you back your debit card. How do they know you didn't just steal that card?

Some coffee shop owners frown upon people who stay for too long. In the restaurant industry, these people are called "campers." So what if I brought a sleeping bag and tried to start a fire there once? Who hasn't? The whole thing worked itself out. Badly. But it worked out.

With so many liquids, it's a wonder that more laptops aren't getting ruined? I'm trying to get that number up, though. I always tell the owners, that it looked like their laptops were overheating. Also, make sure to never visit the same coffee shop too often because you'll probably get banned for life for following the advice above.

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